balaams_ass's feet
SU like so many other colleges and universities starts classes today. This means that students moved in starting last Tuesday and since I work for Student Computing I get to help out connecting the 7000 PC's to our residential network. I've been doing this a number of years (8 to be exact) but this year I ran into a new wrinkle. I present you balaams_ass's feet.
See anything unusual ? No, no ingrown toenails, no corns or blisters or toejam. Yeah that's it shopping bags. Seems I wandered briskly into a apartment where some South Koreans lived and I had to put bags on my feet. Being the politically sensitive and savvy guy that I am I complied and begged forgiveness for having taken 3 steps on to the carpet. Here's a
link where you can read all about the customs of South Koreans.
And since you asked. Yes I very discreetly snapped the photo while my host was off monitoring the activities of a small child who interestingly enough had just been outside, was barefoot and climbing all over the furniture. This realization made me feel very special as I figured it was my feet they were trying to protect, that is until I got up to leave. You see wearing plastic grocery bags on your feet and trying to walk isn't easy (
think snowshoes on swivels walking on mud) I snagged my right big toe on the left foot bag and only a nimble hop skip and a whoa and my years on roller skates as a kid kept balaams_ass off his umm errr ahhh well you get the picture. It was like some perverse sack race gone horribly wrong. While I think lawsuits are part of what is messing up this country I admit while doing the grocery bag dance I wondered who I would sue?
ba
Nothing terribly clever to report.....
Sorry, but it is a very busy time of year in the
bastion of
Ivory Towerage called
SU. We did move our whole group and I can now provide a picture of my new space. As you can see I have perfected my CD storage, theft prevention system. It has some very unique anti theft designs. One I can spot a missing CD in moments and two it takes forever to read the upside down twisted chicken scratch handwriting on them to try and find the one you want to steal.
Every year it is fun to watch the U put on its best face for the incoming freshmen parents. To let them see where there hard earned tuition dollars go. Part of the process is to beautify the
quad. <-- Click on the word quad and be hyperlinked to a web camera. All summer they have been watering it with one of those big hosed ffft,ffft,ffft ffft sprayers. You know the one's I'm talking about. From the picture can you tell they never moved it and it only reached so far ?
Finally here's page about
interesting and clever uses for duct tape that is very interesting till you read just far enough. Check out how the the section on
Pin-Worm-Begone begins.....
"Sometimes I wake up in the night with an incredible itch just aft
of the top of my inseam. I immediately suspect pinworms,...."
Or this one about Emergency Dog Repair that includes these immortal words.....
The dog wasn't very happy about it, he still
cringes at the sound of duct tape years later.
Seriously the squeemish might not want to click on the link.
ba
Whew.....
Busy doesn't even come close to describing the last few weeks. Got back from vacation and went back to work on a Monday only to be told your moving your group by Thursday. This happens right before school opening and as my development group was supposed to be imaging all 300+ lab PC's that my group manages. Still not imaged but we had fun packing and unpacking and re-arranging furniture to our liking. The new space is better in most ways it just lacks windows to the outside world. In one room (formerly a computer lab for the IST school) they left a camera hanging from the ceiling and pointed out into a co-workers cube. Not wanting to simply unplug the camera we quickly crafted a solution that shhhhould keep everybody happy.
Good thing I watched all those episodes of Mission Impossible.
Duhnt.... duhnt.. da duhnt duhnt.... duhnt.. da duhnt.. duhnt.... duhnt.. da dhunt doo doo dooooooo doo doo doooooo
ba
OCC Gone Bad
Was wandering around Sam’s Club the other day and spotted this bicycle.
I thought wow what a bike. Here’s a bike that’s clearly targeted toward the 9-15 year old boys. Look at the size of the rear tire, look at the extended front fork so designed to make the words “turning radius” oxymoronic. Every young man whilst gazing at this bike pictures a V twin, two cylinder motor roaring to life underneath the crossbar*. Everyone one of them after riding it for two minutes will be cursing and wishing there was a V Twin, two cylinder motor roaring to anything underneath the crossbar*. I picked it up. It’s freakin heavy. I’d guess 45 pounds heavy. It's the re-invention of the bike of my youth - the STINGRAY.
I remember having a StingRay style bike when I was a kid and watching in awe as Chris Robinson rode a wheelie across the Harrison School playground. Being a little stout (5'4" and 190 pounds) I could pull up the front tire for a good 3 to 4 seconds. Of course dropping it back down ran a fifty/fifty chance of popping the tire as well.
This bike would be the first chapter in my book titled “Weight Loss for Post-Pubecent Dummies”. Seriously I enjoy the banter between the Paul's, Mikey and Vinny but the Orange County Chopper craze has gone far enough !
ba
* - what’s up with that old crossbar being standard equipment on boys’ bikes. Seems to me neither gender would welcome a sudden trip where their Netherlands ended up there ? Go figure……
The Ass is Back
Back from vacation that is. Spent a week in a foriegn land called Massachusetts. Cape Cod specifically. Actually
Swifts Beach twice voted the most Italian community in MA. Spent most of the time reading
Harry Potter books.
Yeah they're like heroin, addicting but so bad for you. Just kidding. Not the deepest stories but they weave a web of detail that I swear I'm going to find a hole in. Just give me time. Took some pictures while there and I thought I'd share a couple with you. First on the way getting off the MA Turnpike I spotted this "
Your Speed Is" rig right in the far right toll lane. Deserves a really big WTH? For the record I was going 5 mph while approaching the toll. I ax'd the collector what the deal was and he grunted "easee path". I guess the folks that have the EZ-Pass devices (you know the ones that create the really long lines at cash lanes now) on their windshield have been screaming through the tolls and endangering the workers. Leaves me wondering who is dummer the technocrat that installs the "your speed is" rig or the driver who can't slow down.
Since we're on a theme. What you didn't catch it ? Cars and stupid drivers. On the way home we stopped on the
NYS Thruway for gas. Now service areas are kind of one direction places. You drive in and you drive out in the same direction as the roadway you just got off.
RIGHT ? Apparently not for this idiot. She backs around rather then wait the three minutes to get to a pump on the right side of her car. In the meantime since no one wants to pull up to her headlights (I would have) everyone gets in the the other lane to wait. Cars back up past where the roadway opens up and can't get past to the other gas islands and soon they are lined up in front of the over priced Mc Donalds/Gift Shop. I took the picture and she gave me a dirty look so I explained that since she backed in all the cars were now queuing in the other lane because no one wants to block her in. She wittingly retorted "Well I'm just finished" to which I replied "Well, I'm just trying to educated you".
ba
See anything unusual ? No, no ingrown toenails, no corns or blisters or toejam. Yeah that's it shopping bags. Seems I wandered briskly into a apartment where some South Koreans lived and I had to put bags on my feet. Being the politically sensitive and savvy guy that I am I complied and begged forgiveness for having taken 3 steps on to the carpet. Here's a link where you can read all about the customs of South Koreans.
