balaams_ass blog

Happy Easter (or Ishtar - thanks Constantine)

This weekend my house was regaled once again with the sounds of a baby crying. No, no shotgun weddings in the foreseeable future. No, no Mr. & Mrs. Ass haven't miraculously concieved since the plumbing was fixed (umm broken actually). No, no relatives visited bring the joys of babieness into our home.

My youngest daughter brought home Baby Think It Over the latest in safe sex, abstinence training brought to you by our public school district. Baby Think It Over (BTIO) is a computer driven doll that crys randomly and needs to have a special key inserted in its back and held for 20 minutes every time it crys. My wife thought it was great, not that we worry about our daughters, but in addition to the hassle of taking care of BTIO when we went out in public she felt the stigma of people looking at our hussy,tramp,trollop daughter who obviously is too young to have a child. BA on the other hand spent the weekend explaining to people that it was a only a doll for a school project because frankly in an apparent effort to make the doll somewhat racially androgenous they made it pretty hideous. I mean c'mon didn't we learn anything from Michael Jackson?

Anyway BTIO didn't wake me up once, didn't need to be changed (apparently that's an option that's real expensive) and wasn't really a problem.

I did coin a different name for it though. Baby Keep Em Crossed



I really wanted to put the black bar across BTIO instead.

ba

posted by balaams_ass @ 7:51 AM